Dressing (Your Mind) for the Role You Want

                                                              Three stripes is for second Dans too

A few months ago for my birthday, I bought an Adidas taekwondo uniform with the signature three black stripes. I’d had my eye on that style since I saw some black belts, a father and daughter duo, wearing them when I first returned to taekwondo in 2013. For some reason I had in my head that, like those two black belts, I had to be a third degree black belt to wear that uniform–not because of the three stripes, which would seem like silly, obvious kid-logic, but because it was “nicer,” and I didn’t deserve nice things yet. And maybe I thought my grandmaster, who could fly off the handle at the most ridiculous things, would have some unwritten rule that certain uniforms were for certain ranks. (Woe to the branch school owner who wore a criss-cross quilted patterned dobok top to a test one time. Apparently those are for grandmasters only).

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Guest Writer: Train the Mind, Dominate the Moment

Someone asked me recently about the mental/emotional/spiritual aspect of martial arts. I’ve discussed it many times on this blog. But don’t just take my word for it. Today’s inspiring guest post is from Coach Matt Marcinek on how winning happens in the mind before you even set foot on the mat. If you would like to write a guest post for Little Black Belt, please review the guest writer guidelines here.

Everyone talks about toughness.
“Push through.”
“Don’t quit.”
“Be mentally strong.”

But what if we’ve misunderstood what real toughness actually is?
What if it’s not about clenching your jaw and pretending you don’t feel the pressure… but about being calm, aware, and honest when the pressure hits?

That’s the real inner game.
And it’s the one I try to train every day—on the mat and in life.

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The case for tooting your own horn

Fanfare Of Trumpets - Liberta Books

Two of the five tenets of taekwondo are self-control and integrity. Humility is also a characteristic that is valued across several martial arts. 

Take a shy kid at heart, combine her with martial artist humility and a smidge of imposter syndrome, and you get someone who isn’t very comfortable bragging on herself. 

But sometimes that does us good. 

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Turning Fear Into Fun

Martial Arts Similar to Judo - HowTheyPlay

About once a week, I get thrown on the floor. And I pay good money for that to happen. Have been for years. 

Most martial arts students I’ve encountered are afraid of being thrown on the floor, even if it’s the gentlest and most controlled of simple one-step takedowns. It’s scary and weird and unnatural. After over a decade of practicing taekwondo, I’m fairly comfortable with it, even though every once in a while when I’m mid-air I have that existential moment seen on those “so you’re probably wondering how I ended up here” memes before my body crashes into the mat. 

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When the Flames of Imposter Syndrome Loom Large

Fire Images On Black Backgrounds - Wallpaper Cave

I’ve explored imposter syndrome a few times on this blog, once during a period of depression and loneliness and more recently when I was offered the opportunity to do something new at work.

I’m happy to report that (1) I’m no longer depressed and lonely and (2) I’ve gotten a pretty good handle on that new thing at work.

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Start Playing Big

2021 Giant Chess Set Buying Guide - How to Choose the Best Giant Chess

I’ve been doing some work with executives in my company, which requires me to get into a particular floor to access a particular conference room. Every time I go to a meeting, I have to wait in the hallway and hope someone sees me to let me in on time. 

One day, my executive leader saw me from the interior window and let me in. She had a puzzled expression on her face.

“You can’t get in?” she said.
“No,” I answered. In my head, I added, “I didn’t even try because I assumed I wouldn’t have access because I don’t belong here.”

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Imposter Syndrome or Just Feeling Like a Beginner Again?

Dressing for the job I want: pool hustler.

My partner gave me a billiards cue last Christmas and then a glove for my most recent birthday. Despite playing pool for the last several years, I still very much feel like a beginner. I wasn’t sure I “deserved” a good cue until I passed some sort of unwritten, undefined test–like maybe, not feeling self-conscious around all the experts when we play at the pool hall or doing a decent break where the balls don’t end up in a sad cluster or living up to unrealistic expectations of perfection that I unfortunately still put on myself.

What am I trying to prove? Do I need to prove anything at all?

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First Post-Surgery Jump Kicks

Just over eight months into recovery from ACL reconstruction surgery, I did jumping front snap kicks.

You may be wondering how I ended up in this predicament in the first place. Take a look at this post (“POP! Goes My ACL”) for the detailed story of how I injured myself and what followed in the immediate aftermath.

The short version is I tore my ACL doing a jump kick, and not even a good one at that.

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So I Have a Side Hustle After All. Um…#BossBabe?

Boss Babe Starter Kit

Today (a Saturday) I recorded the first of seven podcast interviews my publicist booked for the month of April. I’ve written several articles said publicist has pitched to online media, and I have more items on my to-do list. There’s an essay contest I want to enter (but I have to write the essay first), and in my dining room I have a box of books that I’m slowly figuring out how to divvy up among family, friends, and business associates.

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Spring Sprint

I’m not a huge fan of the phrase “ramp up” because it’s one of the many buzz terms I hear in the corporate world, and it usually means I’m going to have to do a lot of work in a short amount of time.

But, it can also mean exciting things are on the way. Continue reading “Spring Sprint”