If You’re Happy but You’re Burned Out, Clap Your Hands

Burnout isn't budging in the U.S. workforce | CIO

I’ve been wanting to write an article for a while about burnout. The irony isn’t lost on me that it’s taken me over a month to get thoughts to screen because I’ve been “too busy.” 

The first time the thought for the article crossed my mind I was at home, having taken Good Friday, April 18, off after a very busy week of work and two full days of being in a training program. I’d also been dealing with severe insomnia, which I attributed to peri-menopausal weirdness but realize in hindsight was exacerbated by stress and burnout. I’d hoped to spend that Friday doing something fun or spending time on one or more of my hobbies, but because I was so exhausted, I spent the day napping on the couch while I waited for the HVAC guy to show up to install a part and do the biannual check-up since that was the only free time I’d had all month. 

I was too burned out to write an article about burnout.

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Little Black Belt is NINE!

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Ten years ago, on April 1, 2013, I started taking taekwondo lessons again after a 20+ year hiatus and began a journey that changed my life. I am a different (and hopefully better) person thanks to the triumphs, challenges, and lessons I’ve gained from taekwondo. It inspired me to start this blog nine years ago, publish a memoir in 2021, connect with the online martial arts community, and continue to grow as a human.

So let’s celebrate nine years of my blog with my favorite posts from the last year:

  1. Frustrated, Disappointed, and Burned Out – So I Changed My Outlook and Went to Taekwondo Class (May 2022) – After not getting a job I really wanted and feeling stuck in my current role, I did some soul searching along wth kicking and kiyahping to feel better.
  2. From Therapy Every Damn Day to Making It On My Own (June 2022) – This was when I was finally coming out of a depression that had haunted me for over a year.
  3. Taking My Own Advice on Feeling Unstuck (July 2022) – This short and sweet article was my most popular post of the year and one I revisit when I’m feeling down.
  4. I Don’t Practice Every Day. Here’s Why (August 2022) – If practicing your hobbies and interests is a form of self-care, so is not overdoing it. I have good reasons for not doing what I love every day.
  5. My Guest Post: Are You In a Martial Arts Cult? (October 2o22) – This has been my most popular and commented upon post for the website Martial Journal. Toxicity and cultish behavior in marital arts is an important topic we’re not talking about enough.
  6. I’m Glad I Got Injured and Gained Weight (October 2022) – No, really, I am.
  7. The Person Who Inspired Me to Persevere in 2022 (January 2023) – Have you heard of the rapper Prof? Click out of this post and go discover him right now. Hilarious, talented, clever, and soulful, this artist from Minneapolis put on the show of a lifetime and inspired me to follow my dreams.
  8. A Year of Private Lessons: My Personal TKD Comeback Tour (February 2023) – From injury to surgeries to rehab and now moving into recovery, my ACL reconstruction journey went to a whole new level when my coach and I committed to a year of individual lessons.
  9. My Guest Post: Seeking Authenticity? Look to Marital Arts (February 2023) – Another guest post for Martial Journal. Authenticity was alluding me for a long time. Turns out it was right under my feet.
  10. Back to School! (March 2023) – After a year of private lessons I rejoined the ranks.

Sometimes I Just Want to Quit

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No, this isn’t a belated April Fool’s Day joke.

I had this really weird thought recently: “I could just quit taekwondo and not care about it at all.” I love taekwondo, and at that time I had that thought I was looking forward to going back to regular classes.

I’m positive it came from a place of placid laziness rather than a dislike for my martial art. I love being a homebody, and for a while thanks to the pandemic and my prolonged injury recovery, my partner and I had a nice routine of eating dinner and watching TV every night (sometimes with a Boggle or Scrabble game thrown in).

Our routine was safe, easy, and cozy, and all that TV and movie-watching did inspire us to start a movie/TV-themed podcast…so it’s productive time, right? I don’t have to put on shoes. I don’t have to drive. It’s wonderful. I could stay inside my house forever.

But damn if it isn’t the BEST feeling on the other side of a taekwondo class–I’m sweaty, tired, full of endorphins, and have gotten to spend time with people I like (but for a limited, doable time; prolonged time spent with people cramps my style). My partner goes to a black belt-level grappling class with me so I have a built in training buddy to work on techniques with. I’m really happy to be back after being out of the game for so long.

Funny how I procrastinate the two things I love to do and the two things I’m best at–taekwondo and writing. I will literally do anything to get out of creative writing–clean the toilets, fold laundry, work on a smaller writing deadline. But when I get on the other side of a writing spurt I feel amazing. I trick myself into working by setting a timer. So far that’s the only method I’ve found for making myself sit down and work.

I’m feeling happy at this point in my life. All is well. I guess it’s time to chip away at old habits and build new ones.

Unlike some of my other blog posts, I’m not offering a solution. I’m just sharing an observation.

It’s kind of funny.

Is My Injury Bad For My Image?

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You can barely see her knee surgery scars from here.

The editing work for my upcoming memoir is finally done, and now I’m dipping my callused toes (from all the roundhouse kicks, of course) into publicity. I’m *thisclose* to selecting a publicist and very excited about the next step of my publishing journey.

The ACL injury and subsequent surgery seem like especially bad timing.
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Don’t Forget to Have Fun (and Breaking Boards is HELLA Fun)

So this happened on January 18th:

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“Are you excited?”

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Love is Like Grape Soda…or, Being Happily Single on Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentine’s Day! I still feel the same about love and grape soda.

Send Off to 2016…Bye Felicia!

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Ah 2016, the year where everybody sat back and said, “WHAT THE F_CK IS GOING ON??” Seriously, what was up with this year? A bunch of cool celebrities died, people were blowing each other up and shooting into crowds, scores of refugees were trying to escape their war-torn countries and many died in the process while the world watched, the US presidential campaign was a nightmare that further divided the country, sexual assault is still a thing that goes unpunished, racial inequality still runs rampant, people were walking into traffic trying to catch a damn Pikachu, and that’s just some of the stuff that was happening publicly.
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My Favorite Posts From 2016

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2016 is almost over, much to the relief of just about everyone. Thank you all for reading and commenting on my blog. It’s been a busy writing year for me. I posted to the blog every month, am in heavy editing mode of my book, and most notably I started writing guest posts for the website BookMartialArts.com. You can read them by clicking here.
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I Am Who You Think I Am

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I have one for every day of the week…

Lately I’ve gotten some positive feedback from people in different areas of my life. They see me as strong, calm, and a perfect fit for a taekwondo instructor. One of my coworkers calls me an “Activator” because I am quick to complete tasks. Another coworker asked me a lot of questions about taekwondo when she found out I practiced it, and said she saw the inner strength and peace within me befitting of a black belt. During a period of job upheaval a coaching client was adamant that I HAD to remain his coach, and he would be “devastated” if I weren’t. A mother of some of our taekwondo students told me her kids love me and appreciate the “gentleness” in my style of teaching.
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