out sick

Today my neighbor knocked on my door around noon to see if I was ok. He and his wife had noticed my car had stayed in the drive for a few days. I think his wife sent him around to make sure I wasn’t dead. I thanked him for his concern and explained that I had been home from work with a bad cold for a few days. I was really touched that he checked on me. It’s nice to know someone will find me before I’m completely devoured by maggots.

That being said I wasn’t able to make it to taekwondo Monday night and may have to skip sparring this week because I doubt I can breathe with a mouthguard right now. I lost my voice, so the only ki-yahp I could muster would sound like a little dog who in a moment of bad judgment forgot it was wearing a shock collar. I miss my friends, I miss sweating and having a good workout, I miss the routine of places to go and things to do to fill my day.

I consoled myself yesterday by doing all the kee-bons (we have 8 although most schools only do one) and the palgwe forms around my living room. To my delight my technique had once again improved right under my nose. My movements, despite accommodating the coffee table and recliner, were precise and swift. (Yes I kept it low impact and gentle since I’m under the weather). I had the TV on for company and background noise but soon completely tuned it out because I got so mentally focused on my forms.

Even though it usually comes in the form of an illness I need and actually like these mini-exiles. As an introvert I need down time away from people to recharge, and I even need a break from my busy self. My work days are filled with meetings and team huddles, my nights are filled with yelling and jumping, and my Saturdays and Sundays have turned into errand days. Every couple of months my body will hit the big PAUSE button…and I’m thankful for that. It reminds me to take time to just sit and be present.

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